So yesterday I opened to Romans and began to read, and when I got to verse 16 of chapter 1, I stopped because it really struck me.
"For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ,
for it is the power of God to salvation for everyone who believes,
for the Jew first and also for the Greek."
It really made me pause. I am not ashamed! Yet, I find myself in situations where I hold back. For example, this weekend at Disney we were paired with another family. While I was sitting out a big kid ride with Davis, I had an opportunity to hang out with the Grandma in this family who was sitting out with their little girl. Now, the weather this past weekend was very iffy, and recently one of my boys has developed a huge fear of storms. So he kept checking the sky, saying he wanted to go inside, and crying off and on. I kept telling him over and over again "Fear is not of the Lord". So as I'm visiting with this Grandma and talking about it, I almost shared that, but then I held back. I don't know exactly why, but I do know that the thought crossed my mind that I didn't want to be the cause of awkward silence if she didn't know how to respond. Then later in our conversation she mentioned God being good, and it's like the floodgates opened and I started sharing unabashedly with her about different things.
I've always known I struggle with being a people pleaser. I don't like it when I think others are upset with me, or even that others don't like me. But, in life there are going to be situations where that may take place.
Recently, I'm really focusing on trying to please God and not others. I don't like rejection! But, I'm realizing that if I share Jesus with someone, they may not accept Him, and if they reject me in the process, it's not personal. Rejection can come in many forms. It's not necessarily someone screaming in your face to get away from them, it can be as simple as feeling like others may be avoiding you, or not choosing you to talk with or hang out with. No matter the form, rejection doesn't feel great, but I am trying to remember that we are talking about someone's eternity!
When I was little I was a great evangelist. :) I remember gathering up the neighborhood dogs and telling them Bible stories. : ) I also remember being burdened for a family member and drawing a picture and sending a letter with it to them telling them about Heaven. As a child I wasn't afraid of what others thought. I just wanted to make sure that those I cared about would be in Heaven with me.
So no, I am not ashamed of Christ and what He has done for me, but why do I still hold back? Fear. I need to remember what I am always telling my son with the storms....Fear is not of the Lord. So, I am praying for boldness. Boldness to share with those around me. Boldness to speak up when it's uncomfortable. Boldness to say the name of Jesus anytime, anywhere. Boldness to lead someone to Christ. As I just typed that my soul leapt with joy at the very thought of it!
As I was thinking about this topic, I thought about the Auca Indian Missionaries who gave their lives for the Gospel. Jim Elliot, Nate Saint, Ed McCully, Peter Fleming, and Roger Youderian were young men when they went to minister to this tribe. Jim Elliot wrote one of my favorite sayings of all time...
"He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep, to gain what he cannot lose."
These men gave their lives. What am I willing to give?
If you have never watched their story, I hope you will take a few minutes to watch the video clip below to witness this amazing testimony of so many God followers.
(FYI...It does not show any gruesome pictures, but it does show some clips of discovering the men after they were killed.)
I read somewhere that God could have brought salvation another way. He could have allowed angles to tell us about Him, yet we get the honor of telling others about His great love, and we get to experience the joy and celebration that follows as we witness others coming to know Him.
May your eyes be opened to see those around you hungry for His love. And may we all be bold enough to share. :)
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